This is my first month participating in the Golden Vlog and I am excited and nervous! I have never vlogged before and of course my first time doing it I am asked to open up about my insecurities haha. Feel free to watch the video below and to check out the other amazing posts here. Don’t judge my first vlog too much please! If you don’t want to watch the whole video you can read about it below 🙂 https://player.vimeo.com/video/141738171
8 Oct 2015
The Golden Vlog Series
What is your biggest insecurity?
I would have to say my biggest insecurity is my size. I often get people telling me how lucky I am to be so thin or people thinking I have an eating disorder. I soon realized I had to make sure to eat something around people and not go to the bathroom after I ate to help silence the thoughts. I have never had an eating disorder but being judged as if I did is just as painful. On the other hand some people constantly tell me how lucky I am or ask me what my secret is and will continue to make comments and that gets old and annoying as well.
How long have you struggled with it?
My earliest memory of being criticized so much about my size was when I was about 10 years old. So about 13 years.
Do your friends and family know about your insecurity?
I know that some of my friends and family know but it’s not something I actively talk about. I don’t think they do just because they know I don’t have an eating disorder or anything and I have been able to overcome it pretty well.
What do you do to overcome it?
I was lucky enough to learn at a young age that people are going to judge/hate me throughout my life and there is nothing I can do about it except control how I react to them. As long as I am comfortable and happy with myself that is all that matters. I also know that people only wonder and ask because they care enough about me to see if I need help. Thankfully I have a great support system in my life where people will not only ask but will also trust that I am being honest with them.
What advice would you give your younger self or anyone else struggling with your insecurity?
I would tell myself to recognize that I was hurting quicker so that I could deal with the issue quicker. Also to talk about it more. It was something that I struggled with on a daily basis and even though I was pretty confident with my image it still stung a little to know that people thought I had an eating disorder. I would try to fix it myself but sometimes just talking about it with people you trust can make you relax so much easier.